Everyone tells you, “When God closes a door, He always open a window” or “God’s timing is best”, and in your heart you want to believe them, but deep down in places you don’t even want to admit to yourself, you are afraid God isn’t going to come through for you. You’ve seen God be faithful in the lives of your family and friends but you’re not sure He cares for you enough to be bothered to show up in your life. You just know you’ve messed up your life enough times that God’s closed His ears to your prayers and you will have to figure this out for yourself.
I couldn’t hold back the tears anymore as I had to tell one more of my beloved friends, no, beloved family, why I had to leave the place I had called home for two years to start over somewhere else. I told them “God has a plan and He is calling me somewhere else”, and I knew in my heart I was telling the truth but in my heart of hearts I wondered what I had done wrong. You tell yourself “God doesn’t ask you to do something that hurts so bad or causes others such pain, so this is not of God.” “You’re just mistaken.” “You messed up and what you feel now are the consequences.” But Praise God! This is not the end of my story!
As my eyes looked over the rolling landscape of the country of Rwanda, I realized I was making all of this about ME. I was mad at God because my life wasn’t going the way I wanted it to go. I was angry because my plan of what I thought a missionary’s life was supposed to look like was not coming to pass. I wanted to get married and raise my children in Zambia, Africa. I wanted a safe life! Most people reading this will laugh at me but for me that was a safe life. I wanted the life I had already figured out. The life with no surprises or possibilities of mistakes. But God! I love that phrase! But God! had other plans for my life. His plan for me is much bigger than I was willing to believe and I am just starting to see a glimpse of that plan. Spending five days in Rwanda and seeing God show up for us in ways I had only dreamed about until now was just part of what I now know God wants to do in my life.
For now I know God wants me to assist in starting Mission Critical’s first headquarters in Bogota, Colombia and a house in Rwanda for orphans called Mercy’s House after my beloved adopted sister Mercy. But I know He has so much more in store for me and I am ready for the adventure!
After reading my story I hope you believe that God’s unending faithfulness and grace is for you! God is never deaf to the prayers of His beloved servants! And God always opens a door when He closes a window in your life!
Rebekah Bullen
Missionary to the world with Mission Critical International!
May God bless your foundation and your wonderful,blessing Father and Mumy, and family in General1!thank you so much for what you did in Rwanda during January This Year! May GOD remember all!! Hebrews 6;10, 2 COR 8:1-5!!! SHALOM
As my eyes looked over the rolling landscape of the country of Rwanda, I realized I was making all of this about ME. I was mad at God because my life wasn’t going the way I wanted it to go. I was angry because my plan of what I thought a missionary’s life was supposed to look like was not coming to pass. I wanted to get married and raise my children in Zambia, Africa. I wanted a safe life! Most people reading this will laugh at me but for me that was a safe life. I wanted the life I had already figured out. The life with no surprises or possibilities of mistakes. But God! I love that phrase! But God! had other plans for my life. His plan for me is much bigger than I was willing to believe and I am just starting to see a glimpse of that plan. Spending five days in Rwanda and seeing God show up for us in ways I had only dreamed about until now was just part of what I now know God wants to do in my life.
For now I know God wants me to assist in starting Mission Critical’s first headquarters in Bogota, Colombia and a house in Rwanda for orphans called Mercy’s House after my beloved adopted sister Mercy. But I know He has so much more in store for me and I am ready for the adventure!
Viateur Nteziryayo
May God bless your foundation and your wonderful,blessing Father and Mumy, and family in General1!thank you so much for what you did in Rwanda during January This Year! May GOD remember all!! Hebrews 6;10, 2 COR 8:1-5!!! SHALOM